Notes from the Couch, Rio Style

It's Olympics time, and I have been waiting for these two weeks alllllll summer.  Partly because I love watching the Olympics, and partly (mostly) because I knew once the Olympics were airing, baby would be debuting soon after.  I kept picturing myself, 9 months pregnant, sitting in my air conditioned bedroom, eating ice cream and hoping Bob Costa's eyes were back to normal after Sochi:

And here we are, and Bob Costa is back to normal.  But my how things have changed.  Missy Franklin is not winning every swimming event  ~ what's going on with her? I'm seriously concerned.  I just watched a documentary about her on Netflix called Touch the Wall, and she is such a sweetheart who wanted to swim for college and refused to go pro.  But then after two years of college, she turned pro and somehow has gone downhill.  Please don't tell me she peaked at 17, that would be so sad.

Michael Phelps was amazing last night...in the dressing room.  While his rival, Chad Le Clos was (I say "bullying", Phil says "trying to get in his head"), Michael gave him the death stare of all death stares:

They'll be swimming next to each other in the finals tonight - should be good!

The Russians are accused of doping, and Lily King is speaking out vocally, and (thank goodness) beating her competitor fair and square.  Crack is whack, remember that.

Speaking of crack, every time this husband/coach comes in view, Phil says "Is nobody questioning what kind of drugs this married couple is on?"  Because seriously, he is in full beast mode, she is packed, and even she describes their relationship as complicated:

  

Roid rage?

Sychronized Diving is one of the Olympic sports I just can't watch.  I don't get it, why can't they just dive individually?  I can't keep my eyes on both people to understand if they did well or not.  It's too nerve racking.

A 41 year old gymnast is competing for Uzbekistan.  Wow!

How can I fail to mention the French gymnast who broke his leg so gruesomely?  I'll just give you the aftermath photo, you can google the more disturbing images if you want.

Simone Biles is an amazing little powerhouse gymnast to watch.  All the US gymnasts are so fun to watch, actually.  What a great and talented group!  

But isn't the size difference of these two Olympic athletes so amazing?

A person's a person, no matter how small.  Or tall.  :)

The cycling events had me riveted, even though they ride for hours and hours.  I just can't get over who would think riding bikes together that closely, at downhill speeds of 50 miles per hour around dangerous turns wearing barely any protection would be a good idea?  

Sometimes it's not.  Shudder.

We googled "Do cyclists wear diapers?" after contemplating how they ride for over 6 hours, and got some interesting responses.  I know now what  "doing a charley" means.  And then to see all the spectators running out into the streets to cheer them on...I kept thinking somebody was going to get run over.  I couldn't not watch.

And in bikini news, I mean beach volleyball news, Keri Walsh has a new partner but just as little clothing.  If I'm going to be in the sun all day, falling around in the sand, running/jumping/hitting a ball...why would I ever want to wear barely-there clothing?  I feel like these women should be the most covered up of all the athletes!  When I'm at the beach with my kids, and basically all I do is sit in a chair or walk to the water to dip my toes in, I still come home with sand in places I didn't know existed.  How do they handle it?  Plus, look at this (sexist?) discrepancy:

Men:

Women:

Just saying.

Also, I sing Copacabana in my head every time I see the beach in Rio.  Who's with me and Barry Manilow?

I can't wait for Track and Field to start next week as well as my own Olympic event to be over.  If you don't think pushing out a baby that you've been growing for 9 months is Olympic-event worthy, then you're not a mom :)  And that's my Notes from the Couch, Rio Style.  See ya on the flip side.