Not Letting it All Go

Why do I work out?

1) To get a mental break and feel so good about life in general.

2) To be healthy.

3) To stay attractive for my spouse.  

Wait, whaaaaaaaaat????  Isn't that a sexist and belittling reason to stay in shape?

Well, allow me to explain.

"Get ye to the gym, woman!"....is not what he commands.

You see, back when Phil and I were dating, I was already a very physically active person who made exercise time a priority.  Phil loved to play sports and worked an active job when he wasn't in class, which kept him fit and healthy.  We both loved to eat and enjoyed delicious meals and yummy treats, but we were burning calories and had young metabolisms, and were able to stay fit without too much effort.  Oh boy, did we eat a lot of pizza and fried mozzarella sticks back in the day!  

We cleaned up our eating habits a bit before our wedding, because you know, looking good on one's wedding day (and night!) was a normal goal to have.  We were pretty pleased with our results for the big day and left for our honeymoon in the Caribbean with our suitcases packed with bathing suits, and not much else.

Rehearsal Dinner 2002

I returned home from our honeymoon about five pounds heavier, we managed my parent's ice cream shop that summer (and ate our weight in ice cream), and I got pregnant with John-Paul a month after we were married!  Needless to say, the pounds started adding up, the exercise started slowing down, and Phil was putting on sympathy weight right alongside me.  Four kids in four years left us both looking and feeling a little bigger than we liked. We had officially let ourselves go.

And you know what happens when I don't feel good about the way I look?  I'm much more withdrawn and unavailable to Phil because I don't want him to see me.  I feel depressed and ashamed when I know there's something I could be doing to change it, yet choose not to.  Does Phil make me feel that way?  Of course not!  But during times when I'm out of shape,  I feel that there's no way he could be attracted to me. 

So I made exercise a priority once again, trained for my first half-marathon, ate real foods and smaller portions, and eventually I looked like this:

I would love to get back to that level of fitness again, I felt so great!!  And having a wife and mother that feels great about herself only benefits the family.  I don't think that marriage should be an excuse to let yourself go.  In truly loving someone, don't we want to give them our best, and shouldn't they want to give us their best?  I'm not talking about the worldly viewpoint of a "perfect body" full of botox and plastic.  I'm talking about a normal, healthy body that is treated with respect as it is the temple of the Holy Spirit.  Pregnancies, postpartum, breastfeeding, illnesses are all times that we may not be able to look a certain way, but we can still try our best to make healthy choices.  I think our spouses deserve it.  Yes, we promised each other for better or worse, in sickness and in health...but don't we want to give them the "better" and the "health" parts of that deal while it's in our control?

So I'm back on the bandwagon to lose this baby weight, feel good about myself, and be a happier person overall.  I'm starting small, with walk/jog intervals or bike rides and this 7 minute workout (which can be repeated 2 or 3 times):

Perform each exercise for 30 seconds, rest 10 seconds between.

I want to feel good mentally, be healthy, and feel attractive for my husband.  Who's with me?

7QT on a June Day

1)

Wow, June already.  Who is speeding up these months?  On the agenda for June we have a Kindergarten graduation (sniff, sniff), my niece's 8th grade graduation, the kids getting out of school for the summer, Phil getting out of work for the summer, Altar Server Bootcamp, and a 24 hour getaway for our family to celebrate a great school year!

2)

What would a blog post be without an updated picture of the resident Martin baby?

Declan is 2 months old and still falling off the growth curves at each appointment.  He is now in the 15% for his weight.  Poor skinny little man.  Our pediatrician is starting to get a little bit concerned as to why since he eats from me nonstop when we are together, and gets my pumped breastmilk while I'm at work.  I joke that I'm making skim milk this time around.  She is having us come back in one month for a weight check, so we'll see what happens.  Otherwise he is a very happy and healthy baby boy, and still the main attraction in our house these days.

3)

Today is National Donut Day!!  As if anyone needs an excuse to eat a donut :)

Just don't go to Dunkin donuts - blech.  Find a yummy mom and pop donut shop for some that are truly worth their calories!  (I love me some DD coffee and breakfast sandwiches, just not the donuts).

4)

Father's Day is coming soon!!!  

I wrote about my gifts for guys a while back, but now I need a new idea.  What are you getting your husband or dad for the big day?

5)

Phil and I had been thinking about letting our gym membership go.  I joined the gym 8 years ago and have faithfully used it multiple times a week since then.  But, lately we have just been so pressed on time with all the kids and have been going for family walks/bike rides or evening jogs instead.  

Yesterday was the first day I went back to the gym since I gave birth and oh.my.word am I sore today.  All I did was run/walk intervals on the treadmill but it helped me remember just how much I love a good sweat session.  And it seems that I can only have a really good, uninterrupted workout at the gym.  So I think keeping the membership is worth it.  Right?

6)

Maggie has been taking Irish step dancing lessons!  I'm so so so excited about this.  We had looked around for awhile to finally find one, and it's on Cape Cod so it's a little drive, but her friend is taking them too, so her mom drives Maggie for me.  Isn't that so nice?  In the meantime, we're watching a lot of Riverdance...

That gave me chills when I saw it live as a young girl, and still does every single time I watch that clip.

Here's the two Irish girls before their first class:

Maggie is 6 and Sophie is 5, and yes Maggie is a giant :)

7)

Still waiting on Dweej and that stubborn baby boy.  I know allllllll about that, and can't wait to hear the good news!

Have a great weekend everyone!

Parenting School

Parenting School 101: If you want to go out to eat with lots of littles, breakfast is your best bet!

When the kids asked us on Mother's Day why there's no such thing as Kid's Day, both Phil and I replied in unison "Every day is Kid's Day".  It's just one of those responses they teach you in Parenting School.  

Parenting School is located right next to The School of Hard Knocks, and while the majority of students graduate with a degree in Common Sense, the few who have stayed to earn multiple masters degrees can learn some of the following:

On Pregnancy

 ~ It happens when you least expect it, don't think you can handle it, and yet once that baby comes, you can't imagine life without him/her.

~ Pregnant ladies be crazy.

~ Morning sickness can be lessened by staying in bed and having someone bring you a bagel with cream cheese or peanut butter.  And motion sickness bracelets can really help too.

~ Eat tons of protein, drink tons of water, take your prenatal every day, and walk, walk, walk.  So many pregnancy related problems come from poor diet and exercise habits by the mother.  You can control only certain things in life, and this is one of them.

~ The last few weeks feel like an eternity, but try to enjoy your time before your life changes completely.

On Birth

~ It hurts, but it's awesome.  Like, the awesomest.

~ Every.single.one is different.  You can't plan anything about it!

~ You will never feel more vulnerable, yet at the same time realize how much strength you possess.

~ A husband will be in awe of his wife, and a wife will be in awe of her husband as they look at their brand new family member.  

~ Bringing a new life into the world is an amazing gift from God and we are so lucky to be able to participate in it.

~ Be patient with your body after, it might never look the same, but neither does your family!  This is way easier said than done.

On Babies

~ Relax.  Relax, relax, relax.

~ If breastfeeding, just feed them all the time, it solves most problems.  Don't feed them only on a schedule...babies get lots of growth spurts and your milk needs to keep up.

~ When they cry, do the 3 point check: diaper, burp, hunger.

~ Whenever possible, lay them down to sleep, lest they need to be held, rocked, nursed to sleep every time.

~ If you ever want to give them a bottle in the future, introduce it around weeks 3-4 so they get used to it and don't outright refuse a bottle at 5 months when you NEED them to take one.

~ Babies cry, it's there only way of communicating, just try to remember that when you can't figure out what the problem is.

~ Once babies start to eat solid foods, give them healthy ones.  Save the sugary treats for their first birthday.  Lord knows they will eat enough junk food when they can make their own choices.

~ Every stage is just a passing phase.  Teething, sickness, seperation anxiety...it stinks but it will soon pass.

~ You really can't spoil a baby.

On Toddlers

~ Routines and discipline are key!  They thrive on them and it makes a household run so much better.

~ They are little sponges, play time is learning time, and treat them as you want to be treated because they will mirror you.

~ They may look big, and think they are big, but toddlers still have so many of the same needs as babies.  Cuddle them, feed them often, give them plenty of sleep.

~ To get them to sleep well, you have to establish a schedule, follow it, and be strict with it.  If you want your child to go to bed early at night, don't give them a late nap.  If you want them to sleep through the night, look at their nap schedule and shorten it, or take a nap away.  You are in charge of their sleep schedules.  

~ Picky eaters are abundant at this age.  Just keep introducing healthy foods.  Only give dessert when they eat their meal, and don't fill up their bellies with milk or snacks all day and then expect them to be hungry at meal time.  

~ Hide veggies in their food - meatloaf, smoothies, and juices are great methods of veggie transportation.

~ Dessert does not have to be a sweet treat!  Fresh fruit is a great dessert and teaches kids to reach for berries when they want to satisfy a sweet tooth craving.

~ Choose your battles.  Figure out what is important to you, and proceed wisely. 

~ Don't potty train too early, it only stresses everybody out.  They will start to give you signs of readiness, so follow their lead.

~ Toddlers are like puppies - they need to be able to run around and release energy, so don't keep them cooped up all day.

On Kids

~ They love to be listened to and talked to like they are important.  Because they ARE important!

~ Praise them, praise them, praise them.  Positive reinforcement works wonders over the reverse.  And let them "catch" you talking good about them.

~ Every child is unique, so you can't expect them to be, react, or think like any of your other children.  You have to be FAIR but not exactly the SAME in the way you treat them.

~ Giving them things never makes them happy long term, it only makes them want more things.  

~ Giving them a sibling and/or your time and attention will always make them happy in the long run.

~ The best time to talk to them is in the car or on a walk.  So go for a drive, take them on a special date, or walk to the library or around the block and really discuss what's going on in their life.

~ Love your spouse.  Display your affection in front of your kids.  They might gag and proclaim it disgusting, but deep down knowing that their parents are in love gives them such security.

~ Teach them manners and follow through on discipline. Getting off your behind to actually follow through on whatever threat you made is one of the hardest and most important parts of parenting.

~ Kids will fight.  Kids will have tempers.  Kids will disobey.  Kids will sin.  They are still good kids who made bad choices.  Never tell them they are a bad kid, reinforce how good you know they are and help them make better choices.

~ When they approach you saying they're hungry for the upteenth time, recognize that they might be bored  and in need of an activity.

~ Introduce them to sports and activities that keep them active and in shape.  It's a great lifetime habit to start.

~ They still need down time.  Institute Rest Time while the little kids nap, it makes for some great readers!

~ Make sure to praise their efforts, not just their results.  A kid who is told they are a hard worker will actually work harder than a kid who is told they are smart.

We have not yet received our degrees on Tweens, Teens and Beyond, but when we do, we'll gladly share what we've learned, as little as it may be.  

I think the most important lesson I've learned in my 35 years of parenting (add up all your kids ages) is that I know nothing.  Honestly.  We just try to go with the flow and remember what works for us, and what doesn't work for us.

So, what have you learned from Parenting School?  Please share your wisdom with the rest of us!!

8 Weeks

Declan is already 8 weeks old today!!  

I know, Tina, I feel the same way.

He's still such a good bebe, loves to smile and coo and stick his tongue out at us.  He eats a lot but is staying fairly skinny and long.  I do love me a chubby baby, so I'm hoping he eventually gets fat, but the doctor isn't worried so me neither.  He sleeps amazingly well.  He gets a bath around 8 and goes to sleep at 8:30 and doesn't wake up until 3 or 4 am, eats and goes back to sleep until 6 am.  The bestest.

I am pumping at work, and able to make a little more than he eats, which is nice.  I know eventually the scales will tip and he'll be eating more than I can pump, so I'm storing up a supply for when that time comes.  I'm also not opposed to giving him formula if and when he needs it.  I just try and do the best I can with pumping for as long as I can (which in the past has not been too long) and keep our family happily functioning.  I used to stress and worry about breastfeeding and pumping so much, and now I'm like:

The kids are all still obsessed with him, although the urge to help throw out a dirty diaper has lost it's charm.  Knew that was coming!  We just had a stomach bug (food poisoning?) pass through the house yesterday, with four kids down and out, so we tried to keep Declan away from them.  So far, he's hanging in there.  Oh, and he even has grown to like not hate the car seat, and will fall asleep in it very quickly, which makes going for walks so nice!

Adding this little one to our crazy house has been such a smooth and easy transition that methinks I'm ready for #7..

...just kidding.

7QT: Too Long with Too Many Photos

1) 

DK's Baptism.

On May 17th, Declan joined the Catholic Church!!  

Andrew served both the Mass and Baptism.  Always the philosopher, he asked on the day preceding the Baptism; "If Declan becomes a Child of God tomorrow, then what does that make him today?"

Phil's Dad, a Deacon, came up from Maryland to baptize his newest grandson.  It was awesome.

Deacon Gramps

Andrew kept slowly dropping the book lower and lower as poor Gramps was trying to read.  It's hard to be short, have tired arms, and be easily distracted by all your cousins and friends in the pews, dontchaknow?

Grandpa (my Dad) and Gramps

Gammy (my mom)

Unfortunately, Declan's godparents could not make it up from MD for the Baptism (totally St. Therese's fault, I'll explain later) so we had our "daughter" Haley and John-Paul stand in as godparent proxies, or as I liked to call them, Fairy Godparents.

2)

As soon as Declan was baptized, Phil and I consecrated him to Mary with this prayer.

We've done this consecration with all our babies, but with the middle name Kolbe, this one was a little extra special :)

DK with his parents and both sets of grandparents.

And one with the siblings as well!

3)

So, you may have noticed Declan's Baptism gown.  It's veeeeeeery long and beautiful, and has been worn by almost all of my parent's 21 grandchildren.  The gown was made from my mother's wedding dress, and the lady who made it designed it royal-style, so it's very long and we always feel like the baby is going to get lost in it.  The sentiment behind the gown is so special, and we love to put our babies (even the boys) in it.

4)

We were lucky enough to get permission from our pastor to have the Baptism party at the parish school.  So all 70ish (!!) of us went over for some yummy Italian food, a HUGE cake, music, and fun.

What would a party be without fake mustaches for all the kids to wear while dancing to YMCA?

Marijanna's little boy girl ;)

5)

So I alluded to the fact that Declan's godparents couldn't make it to the Baptism, and it was all St. Therese's fault.  

Watch out, her intercession is powerful!!

It all started back when I was pregnant with Declan and we were trying to plan his Baptism.  We thought it would be really nice to have him baptized at Easter, on April 20th, exactly 11 years to the day John-Paul was baptized (also on Easter).  We knew we wanted Phil's Dad to do the Baptism, and since both he and the godparents lived in MD, and Easter is a busy time for deacons, we decided to go down to MD to have the baby baptized.  After all, naive past Colleen thought, Declan was due 3/23, would obviously be born early, and we could travel down to Maryland with a one month old (or older) baby.  

The only hiccup in our plan was that going down to MD for Easter would mean Phil wouldn't be able to stand up as the confirmation sponsor for one of his students who had asked him.   So he told this student of our plans and she was a little disappointed, but said she would get a proxy for the Confirmation.  I ordered her a rosary bracelet with a medal of St. Therese on it, as her Confirmation name was Therese and thought nothing more of it.

As the due date came and went, and Declan was growing increasingly late, we decided to change our baptism plans and stay home so thy we wouldn't have to travel 8 hours with a what-should-have-been-one-month-old-but-would-now-be-a-stubborn-two-week-old.  So we changed the plans and made new ones, and Phil told his sponsee (is that a word?) that he was now able to be at her Confirmation.  You know what she told him?  She said since the moment she had found out Phil wasn't able to come, she had been praying to St. Therese to find a way to allow him to be there!

St. Therese is so amazing, I have my own rose story with her, but did she really have to make me go TEN DAYS LATE?  Therese, if I ever make it through the golden gates, you got some 'splainin to do :)

6)

OK, enough Baptism talk, even though it was an amazing day!  So I went back to work yesterday.  Boo.  But it was better than I expected and 7 week old Declan did great at the nanny's house with Xander.  He slept 5 hours of the 8 I was away from him!!  What a "good little fella", as Xander always says.

7) 

Last weekend, we went to a track meet for the five Catholic elementary schools in our area, and Andrew came in 1st place in the Half Mile race with a time of 3:01.  THREE OH ONE!

Andrew with his track coaches: my sister, her hubby, and Phil.

He's so stinkin' fast and paces himself so well, I am in awe.  He definitely doesn't get that from me, but he is my favorite exercise buddy.

Have a great looooong weekend everyone!!