Tuesday, September 20, 2016

He Said, She Said


Looking in Andrew's backpack...

Phil: Andrew, why do you have two deodorants in your backpack?

Andrew: Because the middle school teachers say we stink.

Phil: But why TWO?

Andrew: I like to put on both to make sure I smell really good!

#obviously

~

After reading Green Eggs and Ham for the hundredth time:

Xander: Oh I get it now! I know why he finally likes green eggs and ham.

Phil: Why?

Xander: Because he ate them on a boat, and the salt from the water got on them, and salt makes eggs taste good!

#whydidntithinkofthat



JP got hurt two days in a row at school, both times by basketballs being thrown at him:

Me: What's going on?  Who's throwing basketballs at you?  Who should I beat up?

JP: No, Mom, it's just the sixth grade girls trying to get my attention.

Me: Why?

JP: Because they all have crushes on me.

#duh

~

Upon seeing some freshly baked cookies:

Xander: Yes, you can have a cookie!

Me: Huh?

Xander: Yes, you can have a cookie!  Now you say that in your voice to me.

#smartcookie

~

Discussing NFP options for the future:

Me: We can try the Marquette Model again...

Phil: That's how we got Brendan.

Me: Well, we can just have a Josephite marriage until we're fifty.

Phil: Sounds fun.  

Me: Or we could just get really ugly and find each other repulsive.

Phil: (Quietly singing as he walks away) "We're not gonna make it..."

#newthemesong


Driving in the car with the three eldest boys...

JP: (seeing a dead skunk in the road) Eeeeeewwwwww, skunk.

Eamon: (thinking JP had smelled the skunk) It's probably just your pits, JP. 

#goodguess


Recalling the time at school when the water got turned off due to a leak:

Xander: And then Mrs. S came to the cafeteria and said the water was back on and the bathrooms were working again, and I said "Woohoo, let's party!" but I should have said "Woohoo, let's POTTY!"

#missedopportunity



Declan: I Superman!

#nope

11 comments:

  1. Oh Gosh! I just love this. And I am going to have that song in my head all day!

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  2. So funny! We are also not going to make it... :)

    Thanks for sharing the smiles today.

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  3. Love these!! Especially, "say that in your voice to me."

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  4. So funny! The best one was Xander and the cookies - too clever!!

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  5. These are awesome. That Xander really is one smart cookie.

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  6. Oh NFP.
    I'm guessing open to life for baby 8 ;)

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  7. Oh my gosh, these are hilarious!! haha

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  8. Who Xander is smart with the cookies. for realz.

    And nfp... ahhhhhh. :)

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  9. The Green Eggs and Ham one? My mind is blown. I feel like I could write a dissertation on that.

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  10. So many red and blue superheroes.

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