Friday, July 18, 2014

7 QT: Things That Make Me Go Hmmmmm



1)



How does the trash can need to be emptied every.single.day?  We aren't even here for the majority of the day, and yet the trashcan gets filled.





2)



Why don't people give other people the benefit of the doubt?  This week, I left what I thought was a nice, encouraging comment on someone's blog post, and got an angry reply to what I said.  Then someone else tried to stick up for me by explaining what I meant, and that same person left her an angry comment.  There are plenty of times when I say too much, or need to learn to bite my tongue, but when I actually leave what I think is a sweet comment, and then get in trouble for it, it makes me want to crawl back into my shell.

3)



When you say you will pray for someone, how do you follow through?  If a friend asks me for prayers, I try to immediately say a Hail Mary so that I don't forget to pray for their intention.  But maybe there's a better system, like writing it down and setting aside time to pray for those written intentions.


4)


How do people make time for their friends?  I would love advice on this one.  Do you have a monthly girl's night out?  Meet weekly for playtime with the kids?  Talk on the phone every day?  I always feel like I am so busy meeting the daily demands of my own family that I rarely make time to be social, and I know friendships are important  relationships that need to be nurtured.

5)


How come the saying "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" doesn't apply to the Internet?  This is why social media just isn't good for my thin skin.  I try so hard to be careful in what I write, stating my opinions in ways that I don't think will be offensive, and yet still manage to get comments from angry people telling me that because I said education is important to me, that means I am putting them down because they don't think education is as important.  Uhhh, no, I just am telling you about the way I was raised, not saying it's the perfect way to be raised.  Not everything you write about is a reflection on me, and vice versa.  I don't read a post about the wonderful benefits of homeschooling and then leave an angry anonymous comment WITH CAPITAL LETTERS TO SHOW HOW MAD I AM saying that you must be calling me a bad mom because I don't homeschool.

6)


When I was pregnant with my second child, I used to worry about how I was going to love him as much as the first.  Now that I have all these beautiful babies, I still wonder about how a parent's heart manages to love them each so much.  How is that possible?

7)


Is their a cheaper way to feed a family of slightly picky eaters on a budget?  I don't want to skimp on protein, and they don't eat seafood or beans.  Plus I'm not home to spend hours cooking.  Teach me your ways, oh wise ones.

Have a beautiful smack-dab-in-the-middle-of-the-summer weekend!

17 comments:

  1. Friendship upkeep. I'm not sure these days. My husband and I are in a new chapter in our lives. These teens are keeping us busy at a new level and so, I very rarely have time to even pick up the phone and call a friend, let alone send a quick text. I know the other moms with kids my age are feeling the same growing pains, so none of us feel offended, just alone. We do manage a monthly moms night out...the same night each month so we always no when it is. Each mom takes a turn hosting...can be in house or at a bar! LOL Picky eaters. My last child made my husband and I completely throw "what we know about parenting" out the door. She has completely baffled us. Our first picky eater. She is a smoothie drinker so I suppose she is actually the healthiest out of us all. Since she eats veggie style, I throw in protein yogurt into her smoothies or greens. But I'm sure this doesn't help a mom of a bunch of boys. Prayers. I say one immediately. I know other ladies who keep a journal by the computer and add the prayer request in it asap. I like that idea, but have never implemented it. Happy hump day!

    ReplyDelete
  2. 3. Yes, I do the same thing. Pray something right then and there or I'll forget. Or sometimes I remember during family intentions at night. SOG Nelson Baker a local priest up for beatification had a little notebook you can see at the basilica museum in which he listed every intention people gave him right on the spot. I like that. But I'd probably lose the notebook...maybe nowadays it could be on a phone or something?
    4. Part of it is the season of life I'm in where we don't have a baby right now but I've been more socially alive this past year than in at least a decade. I have a weekly prayer group plus I've just been a lot more intentional about making plans and being available later in the evenings. Brian is really great about encouraging it and that is really helpful. I think it might be easier, though, because I'm here with the kids all day. I think if I were in your shoes with working it would be harder for me to come home and then leave again (not necessarily guilt but just an exhaustion and "I want to be home in my pjs" type of difficulty).
    5. That stinks. I'm sorry.
    7. I was surprised to learn a few years ago that whole grains actually have a good amount of protein! It's the processed white stuff that is mostly empty carbs. So I don't feel at all bad about adding brown rice the taco meat to double it or doing similar things. It helps so much with the grocery budget and I don't feel like I have to limit servings as much. And you must get a big freezer, if you don't have one already. That way you can do the 1/4 or half a cow thing or just stock up when meat is on sale. In the winter, soups and chills are the best, healthiest, economical meal for big families.

    Wow, this was long. Happy weekend to you, too :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Colleen:
    Preach on the interwebs thing. It helps me to remember there are people saying these things/reacting that way...But, it's still so frustrating. However, that being said, I notice I can take things very defensively as well (particularly when people in the Catholic blogging world talk about cesarean sections) I have tried to get better at not seeing every insensitive thing people say as a direct attack on me, but it's hard.
    I really struggle with the friendship thing as well. But, almost in the opposite way. Because of the ministry thing I do, I often feel like my social calendar is entirely too full. I want to crawl into a hole and ignore everyone for weeks, but I can't- because my calendar says something is happening. I don't have any solutions, except to say it's about good calendaring and balance (ex: A night out with some friends for me, doesn't make sense on a really busy work week for my husband/I...so I try to avoid those).

    Now I'm gonna go stalk your blog on the ice cream shop (which I LOVED so I can see the comment someone may/maynot have left about education).

    ReplyDelete
  4. Protein = eggs. They are cheap.

    In regards to #5 and #2: I think people are too sensitive these days. Everyone is always offended. I don't leave as many comments as I used to on other blogs because it's hard to know if ppl are going to be offended when you try to not be offensive yet they take it as offensive. So I say nothing mostly. Even on my own blog I am almost too afraid to write something on education or homeschooling or any number of topics because everyone is so sensitive.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Following - I have a no beans or seafood vs budget-friendly protein problem too. I'm all ears for suggestions!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Regarding social media....a wise friend once told me years ago that when we are going through times of stress and anxiety in our own lives, we have a tendency to take it out on others on the internet. Or at least some people do that (like me). Just like how in real life, when I am particularly stressed, I tend to take it on my loved ones...especially my kids (or maybe I'm the only one guilty of that).

    Anyway the internet is hard...it's hard to strike a balance and disagree with someone and come across the right way. I try really hard to just sit on my hands...especially if I'm feeling extra stressed. I think a lot of people really don't understand how they come across. Or they are just jerks and don't care. Anyway, sorry you got nasy comments.

    Regarding #7. I do a lot of things like mixing meat with beans (in ways they won't notice). Like I add beans to taco meat....I can feed my entire family with just 1 lb of ground beef if I add in 2-3 cans of black or kidney beans.

    I've also been known to sneak beans into things like meatloaf, hamburgers, etc. It allows you to use less meat and when it's all mixed in, you can't really taste the beans.

    We also eat soup like once a week. Soup is easy to make in the crockpot and a great way to stretch meat. I make the broth using chicken carcass after roasting a chicken So for example, one day I might have roasted chicken. Then I throw the carcass in the crockpot and make broth and use that to make chicken soup (with the leftover chicken meat). Serve it with some good bread and it's a nice, filling meal. Maybe not so good for summer when it's hot..but great in cooler weather.

    ReplyDelete
  7. The people that are leaving rude comments must be super insecure. And that's their problem not yours! Hang in there Colleen. I enjoyed reading about how you were raised. It made a lot of sense and it sounds like it produced a lot of hard working and well educated adults!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Yes ~ you are so right!
    Be nice ~ quit being so sensitive ~ and keep a bunch of hard boiled eggs in the fridge to hand off to the picky eaters.

    Stealing (borrowing?) your Holy Mary tip, thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  9. #5 Haters gonna hate. Debaters gonna debate. You can't win. So don't try to. Be you.

    #3 I usually say a prayer right then. If it is something specifically on my heart or something BIG I take it to Mass with me. (I like to get there early for intentions and then also personal intentions during prayer of the faithful.)

    #7 I am smack dab in toddler picky/won't eat meat or eggs stage. I'm all ears.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Of course I had to go re-read that post. I was surprised someone felt they needed to go on the defensive. I didn't take it that way AT ALL. It's funny, I've noticed that cruel commenters usually leave no way to get in touch with them or see an actual profile to better understand where they're coming from. Also, isn't the point of blogging to get different perspectives on life?
    Definitely makes me go "Hmmm."

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh, I had several things to say on some of your points and I think it got eaten by the interwebs!! If both my comments make it through, feel free to delete either one. I'll make this one shorter. :)

    #2 I saw your comment and didn't take it at ALL that way. Someone got her britches all in a knot. I thought you were very sweet.

    #3 I say a prayer right away so I don't forget.

    #4 I'm trying to remedy making time for my friends. On the weekends between our kids, grandkids, errands, chores and Mass, there's not much time left.

    #5 I'm very thin-skinned and I don't like it. I usually try not to show it and it's very hard for me to be otherwise, try as I might.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hmm...you've got me thinking.
    Friendships. Currently sucking in that dept. I do Mom's Night Out with my bestie and then occasionally with a group of other ladies. As a group of moms with many (me being the mom with the least), it is so hard to orchestrate a date to get together. Hence, it is usually 4-6 months before we get one planned. Sad. And right now, I need to get out! I need something, because otherwise I get stuck in the drama and work here at home. I hear ya though, it is really hard for me to do anything outside of home due to all that is at home that needs me. Oh, and I live anywhere between 10-20 miles from any place to even go out to. Major downside to living as hermits. lol.. Can you see why it's taken me so long and so much gumption to hop on a plane to come visit??!! I am totally coming out of my shell on that one. yikes!
    Social media and saying something nice. I had to unfriend a couple people on facebook because every little thing they posted I just couldn't swallow. Couldn't. I am thin skinned and when people aren't nice in general or are anti-all-things-I-stand-for types, I gotta cut 'em loose.
    Praying for others. Stink at it due to mommy brain. There are some really big ones that weigh on my heart and head, so I usually remember them. I have started adding this intention whenever I pray or we pray as a family "for all those who have asked for my prayers and those intentions I said I'd pray for". I'm just hoping they are all covered that way. Lazy, I know, but it's really hard to keep everyone's intentions in a list.

    Happy weekend!! We actually have nothing planned and I hope it will allow me to do some major catching up.

    ReplyDelete
  13. #3: I say a quick Hail Mary, too, afraid I'll forget to pray later. But I often think I need to find a better system. And I'm almost overwhelmed by how many people I need/want to pray for!

    #4: I struggle with this. And it's even harder now that my kids are grown, because there aren't a lot of school- and sports-related activities that throw me together with people. You'd think that the empty-nest era would be the era of lunching out with the girls all the time or something; but even though our kids are grown and gone, now my husband and I spend half our time traveling to visit them! I'm awful at making the effort between trips to nurture friendships.

    #6; Oh, YES! So true. I imagine a mother's heart expanding, like the Grinch's. No matter how many kids you have, it grows big enough to love them all equally. (And then the grandchildren come, and the expansion continues!)

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousJuly 20, 2014

    # 7 - slow cookers, and bulk buying meat.
    Now I live in Britain, so my idea of eating might not necessarily be yours, we are from different countries and different cultures and eat different foods.
    I brought two slow cookers and every meal I made I doubled the quantities so that we could eat one and freeze one, in the long term it is always cheaper to buy more and it saves time too.
    These websites are good
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/0/23230098
    http://www.frugalqueen.co.uk/p/frugal-food.html

    ReplyDelete
  15. Hi! I just was recommended to check out your blog today!

    I also say a quick prayer as soon as someone asks for prayers, lest I forget. It's too easy for me to forget all the names and intentions--but I also keep thinking about getting a book to keep a list of intentions.

    And as for friends, man, I struggle on that one. It's hard!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I'm a frequent reader and a very rare commenter. I noticed that rude comment on your hard work/ college post and almost said something on there. Now that you've brought it up, I am going to say...UGH! I don't know why people say stuff on the internet that they (most likely) wouldn't say in person! I know it's hard to have thin skin (and believe me, I have it and was feeling personally offended by that comment too), but if thin skin is who you are, even though it's hard it's what gives you compassion for others, so embrace it!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Just stumbled on your blog and was heartened to hear I'm not the only one who thinks people get a little too defensive about what people blog/comment. I can almost guarantee that it wasn't meant to offend you or to attack your parenting/life/moral choices no matter what a person said. Most people are not trying to offend you... So just say something nice or try not to offend them back. (This has been in my heart this week)

    As for friends I bought my 2 best friends the same subscription to a family friendly food mag for their birthdays. I also got the favour returned so when it arrives in the post I think of them and we text or call each other when we cook something. It's only a little thing but it means we say hi at least once a month. (2 birds with one stone as the mag often has cheep meals in it). I also do the same with a women's running mag for another sporty friend who is interstate. So we message sporting or training tips.

    Hope these find you well.

    ReplyDelete

Talk to me...