7QT: Christmas is ONE Week Away!

1)

I never posted these pics from St. Nicholas Day.  We didn't celebrate this holy day growing up, and I only learned about it once my oldest started Catholic school.  Since most of the time, St. Nick's Day falls on a school day, we just sort of left it to the teachers to celebrate it with the kids.  But when it falls on the weekend/I'm trying to be a better mom/I actually remember to do it, then we fill their stockings with a little sumpin sumpin.

Nerf Bash Balls into stockings do not fit.

Andrew and Eamon got knee pads for basketball...

Maggie got shoes for school (she had just celebrated her birthday with lots of gifts)...

and Alexander got a Transformer.

I think JP was sleeping in (the benefits of a pre-teen!) but he got the first book of the Fablehaven series.

2)

I hosted my book club's Christmas party and surprise sprinkle party for my friend, Laura, who is expecting her first girl after three boys.  I hear that's a good pattern ;)

3)

Maggie is going to finally have a real bedroom soon!  We had set her up in the hallway for a couple years until we could save up enough to do some construction.  

She has told people she was praying for "a wall" for her bedroom, and it was getting kind of pathetic that we hadn't done this yet.  Last night we cleared out her bedroomspace and the kids went nuts.

Gymnastics Party!

Dance Party!

4)

I lined them all up and snapped a photo and asked them each what they wanted for Christmas since it is ONLY ONE WEEK AWAY and how did that happen??

All I Want for Christmas is...

Maggie - new room (Perfect, since it's in process.)

Xander - calendar with chocolate inside (Yeah, we kinda skipped those this year and he's been missing it.)

Andrew - digital watch (To time his runs.)

Eamon - football cards (Because his huge binder full of them is never enough.)

JP - 3DSXL "but if it's too expensive, then a swiss army knife".  (Ummmm, he won't be getting either, because it wasn't even on my radar but maybe for his birthday in two months.)

Declan - ______________ (He seemed pretty happy with that basketball and pacifier, so I think I'm good.)

5)

While I was snapping pics upstairs, I remembered that I never showed you the ugly wall-papered bathroom we updated.  

Before:

After:

I would still like to find something to hide the pipes under the sink, but it's such a tiny space that nothing has worked yet.

6)

JP has been working really hard on his science project.  He researched and built popsicle stick bridges and then tested them for strength.  He wrote a 20 page paper and kept a daily journal and has really impressed us with taking the lead on this project.  He says he wants to be an architect when he grows up, so this was a good project for him.  We barely had to get involved, which made it even better!

7)

Our chapel at work just got decorated for Christmas, and it is GORGEOUS:

Have a wonderful last few days before Christmas better hurry up and shop and wrap and yet still manage to joyfully anticipate the Advent Season kind of weekend everybody!

Go see Kelly for more :)

Learning to Receive and Looking Away From the Storm

I went to a talk at my parish on Saturday, the feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe.  It was given by a woman who runs the pro-life ministry in our diocese, and has a strong devotion to Our Lady of Guadalupe.   It was a reallllllly great talk, and I wish I could remember all the points she made, because she was that good.

I always sit in the back of the class.

For any of you who don't know the story of Our Lady of Guadalupe, please read it.  It is full of so many amazing miracles that I feel bad that all we do to celebrate her is go to Mass and eat Mexican food.  

But back to two of the points from the talk that really stuck with me.  

One of my least favorite scripture readings has been The Prodigal Son.  While I love the fact that the father (God) is so happy and excited to welcome his child back into the family, I could never get over the father's reaction to the older son.  The older son was right!  The younger son ran off and abused his father's name and money and then comes crawling back when he has spent it all, and instead of the father disciplining him, he throws him a party.  The older son sees this hypocrisy and calls the father out - "Hey, I'm doing everything right, and you never gave me a party!".  So true, so justified, so...unmerciful.  

The father responds to his older son that he can have everything he has, it's always been there for him.  The speaker reminded us that the reason the older son is so upset is not because he doesn't have access to all the father's gifts...it's because he doesn't know how to receive them.  God has generously given us everything already.  The joy, the grace, the love, eternal life, it's all ours for the taking.  We just need to learn how to be more open and receive His gifts and do his Will.

~

Then the speaker reminded us of the Bible passage where Jesus is walking on water in a storm, and the Disciples do not really believe that it is Him.  Peter says to Jesus to prove that it is He by letting him also walk on water over to Jesus.  so Jesus says for Peter to come.  Peter starts walking on water towards Jesus, then gets frightened by the storm and asks Jesus to save him.  Jesus tells Peter that he shouldn't have doubted, and as they returned to the boat, he commands the storm to stop.  

I've heard that Bible story a bunch of times, and I've always come away from it thinking the point was that we were supposed to trust that God would take care of us if we do His will.  I never once realized that Peter only started to falter when he took his eyes off Jesus and focused on the storm.  (maybe you have understood this point before, theology for dummies up in here.)

The speaker went on to say that when she lost her son, she spiraled into the depths of depression and despair for about a year.  She couldn't eat or sleep, and doctors were prescribing her drugs that were supposed to knock her out, but ended up just leaving her shaking.  She was a total mess (as would be expected).  She was so consumed with the loss of her son that she was losing her faith.   When she heard someone describe the above-mentioned gospel reading, she knew she was in such a place of darkness because she had taken her eyes off of Jesus.  She was focusing on the storm.  She began to realize that there was nothing she could do to stop the storm, only Jesus could.  She slowly got better day by day by looking away from the storm and keeping her gaze on Our Lord.

Look away from the storm.

When there are things in your life that you can not change as much as you try - the illness of a loved one, the conversion of a relative, stress at work, failing relationships. the attitude of a child, etc. - you have to look to Jesus to change it.  Every time you are tempted to fall into despair and want to give up, look away from the storm.  Let Jesus deal with the storm.  

I left this talk with two important messages - Receive Openly and Look Away from the Storm.  They were good life lessons for me, and maybe some of you can use the reminder as well.  In addition, I also learned a third lesson.  When there are talks given at my parish, my first instinct is to skip them.  I really have to fight the temptation and make myself go (or listen to Phil nudging me to go) even though I have a million excuses and other things to do.  I just want to encourage you to take advantage of these opportunities, no matter how hard it is for you to get there.  The temptation to skip an opportunity to grow in our faith does not come from up above.  I always leave feeling a little more peaceful, a little more refreshed, and a little more focused on the good things in life.  The older I get, the more I thank God that I'm a practicing Catholic because there is always more for me to learn, and practice makes perfect :)

Lazy Parenting

I had my first four babies at ages 24, 25, 27, and 28.  I was young and full of energy and good intentions.  My husband, who is 19 months younger than me, was even more energetic and optimistic.  We really put our everything into parenting that group of little kids.  We disciplined strongly, we hovered appropriately, we played and taught unceasingly.  

We planned outings and adventures, we withheld junk food and sweet treats on a daily basis, we kept charts for behavior and were so involved.  We had to be!  They were all so little and needy! Overall, we really were the best parents we could be to those four babies.  I'm not saying that to brag, we weren't doing anything extraordinary, just fulfilling our vocation's duties.

Then things changed.  Those four babies grew up, and  I started working outside of the home more. We sent our kids to school.  Teachers were now in charge of their days, and they all thrived, but it meant we got used to spending less time with them.  They didn't need as.much.of.us.all.the.time.  We let go a little and it didn't backfire. They were growing up and becoming independent, and it was wonderful!

  

  We had a 3.5 year break before another baby came along.  By this point, I was working full-time.  We sent that baby and the next one (three years later)  to home day cares.  While we love the amazing women who cared for our babies, it was somebody else doing the "dirty work" all day.  We would get them home for all the good stuff - dinner, bath, a show, a snuggle, and bedtime.  Weekends became so busy with sports and activities for the older kids, that we rarely have time for family outings like we used to.  

It's as if we are raising two separate families.

Family One:

Family Two:

The younger two boys are living such a different childhood from the older four.  It's mostly been out of our control...life happens and we all have to adjust accordingly.

But, but, but, somewhere along the line, we also got older and more tired and more lazy.  

While our younger two have the benefit of older siblings who can teach them all the cool things (they really are adored around here), they can also teach them all the bad things.  While JP, Andrew, Eamon and Maggie were only allowed to watch Sesame Street or Veggie Tales at young ages, Alexander and Declan have seen the occasional Spongebob episode or The Thundermans.  It's very hard to keep the house at a constant toddler rating when your oldest is almost a teenager.  

These little ones have a built-in audience for their class-clown ways.  It's difficult to get the older kids to NOT laugh at the misbehaving antics of the little ones, which only eggs them on.  And most times I can't blame them, it IS funny, but unacceptable nonetheless.  

 It's also hard to literally get off my behind to discipline a naughty toddler when I am explaining the Pythagorean theory to a middle school student working on his science project.  It is so much easier to just say "Stop it!" then to actually go and remove him from the bathroom and set the timer while he sits in time-out for teaching his baby brother how to throw cups of water out of the bathtub.

But just because something is hard doesn't mean we shouldn't do it.  

So, we are trying to establish the rules we used to have back in the throes of raising babies and toddlers.  The toddler will get time-outs.  The baby will not get his pacifier unless he is sleeping or at Mass.  The toddler will get a smiley face drawn on the calendar every time he comes home from school "without getting spoken to".  Big kid shows will only be allowed on weekends after the littles are in bed.  During the week, only PBS or Sprout or Mickey Mouse Clubhouse or VeggieTales will be watched.  More family outings will be planned, and even if we can't leave the house, there will be more of an effort for family play time.  Etc, etc, etc.

I know this "second family" of mine will receive benefits from their position in the family (more independence, more street smarts, more playmates, more attention and love) but I can't use that to justify being a lazy parent anymore.  Order will be restored, and with that hopefully peace and joy.  Heaven help me.

Online Shopping Gift Guide

This year, I have done about 90% of my Christmas shopping online.  Without wanting to say specifically for whom I bought each present, I'll give you a sampling of the gifts and links where you can find them.  I love to see other people's ideas for gifts, as gift giving is my love language, and hopefully some of you will find my purchases helpful!

{If you shop through one of the links (found below each picture), I do receive a few pennies in commission, which add up to help our family out.  Thank you and happy shopping!}

Hulk sweatshirt

Bungee Chair

Razor Scooter

Gregor the Underland Chronicles

The Inheritance Cycle series

Be a Man

Emily Windsnap Books

Fablehaven Book Series

Baby's smart phone

Mike Lupica sports books

Sports Guys

Baby's Flashlight

Selfie Stick

Starbucks Coffee iphone case

Nerf Crossfire Bow

Drinking with the Saints

I bought these for myself as Loft was having an amazing sale and Phil usually buys me a Loft gift card for Christmas.  I told him this year, I pre-ordered the clothes and he can give them to me on Christmas.  Not super mysterious, but sometimes it's nice to get exactly what you want :)

DRAPEY SPLIT NECK BLOUSE

PLEAT BACK MIXED MEDIA TEE

DRAPEY RACERBACK TANK IN WHITE and BLACK

DENIM JACKET

LACE HEM TOP

MOSAIC PINTUCKED SHIRTDRESS

The Joyful Passing of Advent

On Saturday I woke up with an upset stomach.  I'm sort of a wimp when it comes to sickness, especially of the intestinal kind, and I laid back down in bed realizing my weekend plans would all have to be cancelled.  Phil took the kids to First Saturday Mass, then Confession, then grocery shopping (yes, he's a rock star!) while I went back and forth to the bathroom, wallowing in self-pity that poor me was not feeling well.  

Then I fell asleep, woke up an hour later and felt 100% better.  Drama at it's finest.  All the plans were back on tap, and my cloud of despair was lifted.

Likewise, a few weeks back, I had plantar's fasciitis in my right foot.  It was so painful to bear any weight that I was hopping around my house for a few days before I was able to step normally, though still with pain.  I lamented to Phil that my running days were over forever and that I needed to join a gym with a pool so I could start swimming since I would never be able to pound the pavement again.  He told me to wait it out.   I took a couple weeks off from any cardio workouts, stretched, iced, wrapped my foot, and used inserts, and wouldn't you know, it healed!  I am back to trying to run off the pounds I quickly accumulated while resting.  

These two recent examples have shown me that I can be a bit dramatic and irrational when it comes to my own body.  Sometimes, a cold is just a cold.  A stomach ache is just an ache.  An injury is just a temporary setback.  A wave of nausea is not a pregnancy scare.  A bruised friendship can be saved.  A ruined dinner can be recooked.  A bad test grade can be resolved. What seems like the end of the world to us in a moment is just a foggy memory in the long run.  Time and prayerful waiting can heal so many wounds.

This too shall pass, says every wise grandmother.  

(Because she knows from time and experience that it's true.)

So many times in life, we just can't see the big picture.  Back when I was pregnant with my fourth child in as many years, I knew, just knew, that I was destined to be pregnant every year until the age of 50.  It seemed so out of our control, so hopeless to think maybe one day we could master NFP enough to make it mostly work.  When there were low funds in the bank, it was nearly impossible to figure out how the emergency car repair bill was going to get paid, but it did.  While trying to plan for our kid's future education, it seems pointless to throw pennies at what could easily be a million dollar expense.  It's so easy to fall into despair in the midst of hard times.  But it's only when we have fallen that God can lift us up, and grant us the grace to get through it.

Source

This Advent, I am aware that we are in a season of waiting for the Christ child.  Yet we already know that He has come, and will come again!  We can be joyful while waiting!  It's so much easier for our generation to be preparing for a celebration of His birth than to be of generations past who hadn't yet received Him at all.  Their despair was real and valid.  We are the blessed ones!  We know Jesus has come to save us purely because He loves us.  We need not despair with the complaints of this world, we already have the hope of eternal life with Jesus.  Just as Advent always leads to Christmas, the things of this world shall pass into eternity.  It's something I need to remember before jumping off the deep end next time I get a man-cold.  ;)

7QT: Martin Family Music Favorites

We listened to a lot of music on our 16 hour road trip over Thanksgiving.  I was like a DJ, fielding requests from the van load of kids, and it was fun for a while but man that gig doesn't pay enough ;)  Here are some we played on repeat...

1)

Gosh I love me some Andy Grammer!

(He does say the s-word in the opening lines.  And it's not "stupid", you've been warned.)

2)

And my husband loves him some Matt Maher!

3)

I must say, he's converted me to this type of Christian music.  He's pretty awesome.  When the kids are driving us crazy, we blast this song and sing at the top of our lungs.  I think I do a pretty good rendition, because ain't nobody needs the Lord like a Mom in a van full of loud kids!

4)

4)

This one has a great car-bopping beat.

5)

My kids love Feel It, and I love that they listen to wholesome music like their mother father.

6)

And they're still whipping and bopping around the house.  It proved more difficult in the car, but they made it work.  Even the baby can do a mean stanky leg.

7) Last but not least, this one always makes me thankful for the precious gifts in my life.

And on that note (pun completely intended) have a great music-listening, bee-bopping, singing-in-the-shower kind of weekend everybody!!

{Go visit Kelly for more 7QT}