Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Being a Mom: From Pimples to Pampers and Everything In Between

While I will always and forever tell young mothers, busy juggling babies and toddlers, that "It gets easier", I am realizing that what gets easier is the physical part of parenting.  The emotional part of parenting never gets easier, and in my humble opinion, only gets harder.

But that's not what an exhausted, hungry, struggling mom wants to hear.  She wants to hear that these days that she is finding so hard to get through, the nights of broken sleep that feel torturous, the hours spent changing diapers and wiping drool, will indeed get better.  She wants to know that she will sleep through the night again, her kids will become potty trained and physically independent, and her days will be much smoother.  

So that's why I say "It gets easier!  You're in the trenches right now!  What you are doing is hard work and sacrifice, and it will pay off!  You're doing great!"

That's what young moms NEED to hear.  They need to feel understood and not like they're unfit for the job thrust upon them.  

Time marches on, and those busy toddlers turn into busier teens, who now have us worrying about their choices in life, their safety on the road, the friends with whom they keep company.  We watch them succeed and fail, get heartbroken and break hearts, be smart and be stupid.  And we feel it all too.  As much as you empathize with your baby's cry when they skin their knee for the first time, you literally ache for your grown children's pains. Their hearts are still united to yours.

I think older moms NEED to hear that they are not alone, that as the physical dependency lessens as kids grow...the worry and emotional stress grows as well.  It's normal.  It's not you, it's them. Somebody give me a hug and tell me this, please ;)

And if you have a big family, like I do, you get to experience it all at once. We get to change diapers and listen to pimple woes.  We feed toddlers and teach tweens to cook.  We discipline with time outs and tech outs.   We worry about the teenagers' buddies while teaching the Kindergartner how to be a good friend.  

It's exhausting.

And awesome.

It's overwhelming.

And wonderful.

We feel like we are going crazy at times, burning the candle at both ends, and yet, the striking contrast of all the ages gives us the ability to appreciate each stage fully.

Because while we are raising young adults, we enjoy our time with the littles so much more.  We have the retrospect to see what truly mattered (manners) and what didn't (matching outfits).  We get to raise them a little more loosely yet more intelligently at the same time.

And while we are raising those little guys, we get to enjoy these big humans we have had the pleasure of knowing all these years.  We watch them teach lessons to the younger set that we taught to them. We understand how quickly time flies, and savor these precious years with them under our roof.  

We truly understand the meaning of "The days go slow, but the years go fast."  

So while it can be hard to be a mom of young ones...and it can be hard to be a mom of older kids...hard doesn't mean bad.  Really great achievements are hard to achieve, that's why they're so great.

I'm so looking forward to the days (God willing) when we can sit around with our grown children and their families and remember how beautiful these days were.  The funny stories we will share.  The memories we will talk about.  To all the moms out there, whether you're dealing with diapers or dating, keep doing the hard work.  You're seen, you're heard, you're loved...and you're creating great achievements.


  1. That emotional investment is the hardest part of parenting. We care so much because we love so much. And it makes God's love for us all seem even more ridiculous and wonderful doesn't it?!

  2. I have 6 children- ages 21, 18, 16, 15, 10, and 2...and I've found that parenting young adult children is harder than any other stage. I wish someone would have warned me!

    Trying to navigate that fine line between supporting them as they spread their wings and stepping in when they are making choices that you know are going to cause hurt is SO hard. Parenting does get easier after the infant/toddler years....and then it gets harder again (in my experience)...but you are right the "new" hard is much more emotional. Thanks so sharing. It is good to know when you hit that stage that it is normal and you are not alone! God Bless!

  3. I loved this. We are in the teen/tween and below years now and it is so differently hard. It’s hard to talk about this and support other mothers in this stage while respecting the privacy of our older kids. Families with teens need extra prayers!


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